The Believer Magazine
Short Imagined Monologues
Send your short imagined monologues to websubmissions@mcsweeneys.net.
-
May 16, 2023I’m the Person Who Designs Open-Plan Office Spaces, Despite Never Having Actually Worked in One
-
May 15, 2023I Will Defend Free Speech to the Death. Or Until an Autocrat Asks Me to Stop
-
May 4, 2023Why God Decided Dogs Can’t Live as Long as People
-
May 3, 2023If Elected President, I Promise to Slaughter Mickey Mouse
-
April 26, 2023Inside the Mind of an AI-Generated Woman Laughing Alone with Salad
-
April 19, 2023I’m Just a Typical British Man
-
April 7, 2023I Am Noah and I Need to Look at Your Animals’ Pee-Pees
-
March 24, 2023The Wedding Vows of Someone Marrying Their “Best Friend”
-
March 6, 2023I Am New Hampshire’s State Motto. Please Remember You Can Die While Living Free
-
February 22, 2023I’m the Neighbor Kid Offering to Shovel Your Walkway Because I Know You Can’t Say No
-
February 20, 2023It’s Me, Teddy Roosevelt, and by “Man In the Arena” I Didn’t Mean You, Spencer
-
February 3, 2023I’m the Kid from The Red Balloon, and That Thing Over Montana Is Not from China
Trending 🔥
Recently
-
May 1, 2025Open Letter to the Guy with “Dad” in His LinkedIn Headline
-
April 30, 2025Our University Is Replacing DEI with Vibes and Vaguely Diverse Stock Photos
-
April 30, 2025This Bank Robbery Is a Safe Space
-
April 29, 2025Don’t Worry, We Were Prepared for Our Policies to Be Extremely Unpopular, Because They Are Very, Very Bad