FURRY COSTUME CONTEST
Short Imagined Monologues
Send your short imagined monologues to websubmissions@mcsweeneys.net.
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April 13, 2017Monologue: My Life Might Look Great on Instagram, But Deep Down I’m Actually a Ciranolid Isopod
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April 11, 2017Monologue: I’m a TV News Journalist and Man, Do I Ever Love Bombs
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April 6, 2017Monologue: Manic Pixie Dream Girls Anonymous
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March 31, 2017Monologue: Vladimir Nabokov Joins the White House Press Corps
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March 28, 2017Monologue: I’m Wes Anderson, and I’m Directing This FBI Investigation Into Russia and the Trump Campaign
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March 24, 2017Monologue: I BUY JUNK CARS AND RUN-DOWN HOUSES FOR CASH $$$. ALSO, IF YOU HAVE ANY FREE TIME, I WOULD JUST LOVE SOMEONE TO TALK TO
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March 23, 2017Monologue: I Don’t Need a Man — Unless You Know Someone
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March 22, 2017Monologue: Agent Cody Banks Steps Down from the CIA
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March 21, 2017Monologue: Peppermint Patty, Esq.
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March 20, 2017Monologue: Not to Brag, But I’m Totally Intellectual Enough to Be Brutally Murdered By Fascists
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March 17, 2017Monologue: A Host’s Welcome Message to Her Fetal Guest
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March 16, 2017Monologue: I Totally Forgot We Were Supposed to Dismantle Capitalism Today and Now I’m Standing in Line for a Cronut
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October 10, 2018My Common App Essay: “Every School Reading This Except Dartmouth Sucks Ass”
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October 20, 2009It’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers
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October 8, 2018Matreon: The Patreon Platform for Emotional Labor
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October 12, 2018I Am Sick and Tired of Constantly Being Bullied for My Extreme Wealth and Political Power