McSWEENEY'S INTERNET TENDENCY'S PATREON
Open Letters to People or Entities Who Are Unlikely to Respond
Send your nonfictional open letters to openletters@mcsweeneys.net.
(Submission guidelines)
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August 7, 2018Open Letter: An Open Letter to the Owner of the Car With the “LOUDER THAN YOUR MOM WAS LAST NIGHT” License Plate Frame Parked at the Portland International Airport
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June 14, 2018Open Letter: An Open Letter to My Dad, Post-Cremation, Concerning His Missing Gold Teeth
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June 6, 2018Open Letter: An Open Letter to White Women Concerning The Handmaid’s Tale and America’s Cultural Amnesia
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May 3, 2018Open Letter: An Open Letter to the Racist Who Saw My Truth When My Liberal Friends Didn’t See My Color
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April 23, 2018Open Letter: An Open Letter to People Who Don’t Make Every Conceivable Effort to Ensure that the Bathroom Door is Locked
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April 13, 2018Open Letter: An Open Letter to Those Who Want to Liberate Me From Wearing My Hijab
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April 10, 2018Open Letter: An Open Letter to Finland’s President Sauli Niinistö
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March 29, 2018Open Letter: An Open Letter to Collegiate Basketball Benchwarmers
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March 7, 2018Open Letter: An Open Letter to the Guy Who Didn’t Believe My Ethnicity Even Though It Was None of His Business
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March 2, 2018Open Letter: An Open Letter to Greta Gerwig About How Her Film, Lady Bird, Passed the Bechdel Test Way Too Many Times
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February 23, 2018Open Letter: An Open Letter to the Phrase “Positive Vibes Only”
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February 19, 2018Open Letter: An Open Letter to James Madison About His Drafting of the Second Amendment
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October 10, 2018My Common App Essay: “Every School Reading This Except Dartmouth Sucks Ass”
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October 20, 2009It’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers
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October 8, 2018Matreon: The Patreon Platform for Emotional Labor
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October 12, 2018I Am Sick and Tired of Constantly Being Bullied for My Extreme Wealth and Political Power
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October 18, 2018Welcome to Breastfeeding Class, Surrender All Hope
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October 18, 2018List: Fresh Middle-Ground Alternatives Between NIMBY and YIMBY
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October 18, 2018Lest We Forget the Horrors: A Catalog of Trump’s Worst Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes: Atrocities 1 to 112
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October 18, 2018Fuck You, We’re Sight Words!