Open Letters to People or Entities Who Are Unlikely to Respond

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Send your nonfictional open letters to openletters@mcsweeneys.net.

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An Open Letter to the Former Owner of Our House
by Katherine Heiny (5/23/2014)

An Open Letter to Your Unreadable Hashtag
by Elizabeth Ann Entenman (5/2/2014)

An Open Letter to My Ex-Fiancé About My Recent Arm Amputation
by Amalie Brettschneider (3/24/2014)

An Open Letter to the Temporary Employment Agency That Keeps Lying to Me About How Good a Job Is
by Ellen Waddell (2/28/2014)

An Open Letter to Men On the Subway, Specifically During Morning Rush Hour On the A Train Between Jay Street and Canal
by Jenna Clark Embrey (2/21/2014)

An Open Letter to the Ugly Mug I Painted at Paint A Dream Last Weekend
by Beth Thomas (2/12/2014)

An Open Letter to an Open Letter to an Open Letter
by Gene Morgan (2/4/2014)

An Open Letter to the Men Who Ask Me Where I’m From as a Means of Initiating a Romance
by Homa Mojtabai (1/23/2014)

An Open Letter to the Man On Match.com Who Emailed Me to Fix a Grammar Mistake On My Profile Page
by Kate Susa (1/17/2014)

An Open Letter to My Anorexia
by Shannon Frost Greenstein (1/10/2014)

An Open Letter to Paleo Diet Enthusiasts
by Lea Baylis (11/13/2013)

An Open Letter to Truckers from Your Adopt-a-Highway Volunteer
by Michelle Webster-Hein (10/18/2013)

An Open Letter to Straight Men
by Brandon Ambrosino (10/4/2013)

An Open Letter to the Lady at the Farmers’ Market and the Lady at the Apple Store Who Offered Me Their Unwanted Condolences for Expecting a Second Baby Boy
by Stacy Biscardi (8/23/2013)

An Open Letter to the Mango Fly Larva Living in My Left Buttock
by Juliana Peluso
 (8/9/2013)

An Open Letter to My Ex-Boyfriend’s Mother
by Julia Edelman (7/26/2013)

An Open Letter to My Two-CD Set of Miles Davis’s Bitches Brew
by David Hart (7/12/2013)

An Open Letter to #fitgirls
by Emma Froggatt (7/2/2013)

An Open Letter to the Hot Canadian Zumba Teacher Who Pulled Me Onstage After My Mother Died
by C. Evelyn (5/24/2013)

An Open Letter to My Toddler Regarding His Use of My iPhone
by Lauren Apfel (4/26/2013)

An Open Letter to My Fellow Bachelor of Environmental Studies Graduates, Class of 2013
by Claire Hamilton (4/19/2013)

An Open Letter of Thanks to the Guy With the Smirking Look of Disdain and Superiority When I Try to Upsell Him at My Dead-End Retail Job
by Daniel Callahan (4/12/2013)

An Open Letter to Andrea Angrum, Site Director for NASA’s Voyager Program
by Juan Carlos Llorca (4/5/2013)

An Open Letter to Canonical Authors
by Daniel Wallace (3/22/2013)

An Open Letter to Steve Regarding His Stay at My House While I’m Gone
by Jim Stallard (3/14/2013)

An Open Letter to Arabic Labials
by Lance Schaubert (3/1/2013)

An Open Letter to Targeted Online Advertisers
by Molly Schoemann (2/15/2013)

An Open Letter to My 1994 High School Class Regarding My Designation of “Most Likely to Succeed.”
by Eric Corpus (1/25/2013)

An Open Letter to Self-Interrupters
by Chris G. (1/18/2013)

An Open Letter to the Today Show
by Meg Thompson (1/11/2013)

An Open Letter to the Elf On the Fucking Shelf
by Jennifer Scharf (12/21/2012)

An Open Letter to the Job Market
by Danielle Leduc (12/7/2012)

An Open Letter to Facebook’s New Privacy Policy
by Jessica Olien (11/30/2012)

An Open Letter to the Phrase “Having Said That.”
by Crystal Galyean (11/9/2012)

An Open Letter to Co-Dependent Parents Who Are Raising Overly Dependent Children
by Michael Whalen (10/26/2012)

An Open Letter to People Who Use the “Battle” Metaphor for Other People Who Have the Distinct Displeasure of Cancer
by Aria Jones (10/19/2012)

An Open Letter to the Dude-Bros Who Yelled “U.S.A! U.S.A.!” at a Lynyrd Skynyrd Concert
by Kelly K. Ferguson (10/12/2012)

An Open Letter to People Who Google and Subsequently Attempt to Contact “Rachel Farrell.”
by Rachel Farrell (10/5/2012)

An Open Letter to the Childhood Icon I Happen to Be Meeting With in a Professional Capacity
by Kaite Welsh (9/28/2012)

An Open Letter to Jif Peanut Butter
by Will Kaufman (9/21/2012)

An Open Letter to the Look That Slowly Forms On Your Face When I Tell You I Am a Librarian
by Becca Brody (9/14/2012)

An Open Letter to the People in Charge of Commercials Targeting Women
by Elaina DeBoard (9/7/2012)

An Open Letter to the Mix Tape Made for Me By My College Boyfriend, Now Deceased
by Summer Brennan (8/24/2012)

An Open Letter to the City and County Inspector Who Fined Me $500 Even Though the Weeds in My Front Lawn Were Well Under the 6” Regulation Height
by Abigail Templeton-Greene (7/20/2012)

An Open Letter to Natalie Portman’s Character in Mars Attacks!
by Kit McCann (7/13/2012)

An Open Letter to People Who Take Pictures of Food With Instagram
by Katherine Markovich (6/29/2012)

An Open Letter to My Fitness Counselor Regarding My Lack of Response to Her Recent Inquiries
by Liz Thomas (6/22/2012)

An Open Letter to the State of Pennsylvania
by B.R. Cohen (6/15/2012)

An Open Letter to the Kid Scooping Raisins Out of the Bulk Bin and Dumping Them On the Floor
by Genevieve Knapp (6/8/2012)

An Open Letter to the Mammogram Machine at Beth Israel Hospital
by Amelia Blanquera (6/1/2012)

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