Hold up, hold up, hold up. I gotta spill the tea, bruh. I’m lowkey freaking out. I don’t wanna get all extra, but:
I got new Tupperware.
I know, man. I know. It’s bussin’.
No, no, no, no, no. Not from my mah’s. Hold up. Listen, yo. I’m not talking finish-your-ice-cream-leftover-homemade-gravy-in-a-Talenti-container-shit. Big facts. This stuff I got from the store is better than a used Talenti container, bruh. No cap. Even the good ones that hit different and haven’t been through the dishwasher yet. It’s straight fire. The GOAT, bruh. The GOAT.
They sell Tupperware in stores. You know that? I’m literally dead, bruh. And I know I’m lowkey using the brand name for a generic idea, you know? Tupperware is a brand, and we all just use the term for all leftover containers that accumulate without lids on the top shelf. Just like people call tissues “Kleenex” or lip balm “Chapstick,” or use the term “Google” to search on any online platform. It’s like specific terminology folded into the cultural consciousness that we don’t notice. But I digress, bruh.
What?! Did you know you could buy this shit? I highkey did not know that. It’s dank. You can go into a store and buy these perfectly sized containers with matching lids to pack up your stir fry for lunch tomorrow. I was sus, but they even have glass ones. And stainless steel. Sustainability slaps, yo. You don’t have to rinse out a yogurt container or nothing. That’s got rizz, bruh.
Look at this Tupperware set. This is my Tupperware Era. I stan this Tupperware. It’s giving Good Housekeeping vibes, bruh. That’s some Better Homes n’ Gardens shit. This Tupperware is livin’ in my head rent-free. It’s pop and lock, bruh. It’s sealed for freshness. No drips or spills here, yo. Periodt. And it’s BPA-free. Bet. This Tupperware will not give me cancer. That’s drip, man. That’s drip.
And wait for it, wait for it, wait for it… I finna flex: It nests, bruh! Damn. It fits on one shelf all cozy and shit. Look at that. That’s a thing of beauty.
Hey hey. This was lit, bruh, lit. Maybe I’ll send your leftovers home in one of my new Tupperwares.
Naw, man! Cap! These babies ain’t leaving my house. Your homemade gravy is in the Talenti. I just rinsed it out.