Black Friday Sale

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Through Monday, all pre-2015 books and magazines are HALF OFF, and all titles from this year are 25 percent off. See all the discounts on our store site.

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Colin Nissan

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It’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers (9/23/2015)

James Joyce Orders a Shamrock ShakeUpdated (3/17/2015)

The Twelve Days of Christmas (12/24/2014)

This New Rap Song Has a Refreshing Perspective On Pussy (7/16/2014)

A Climate Change Denier Gets Heatstroke (6/20/2014)

A Single Guy’s Date Story as Interpreted In the Mind of His Married Friend (5/2/2014)

A Few Things Before I Choose You to Watch My Laptop (4/3/2014)

The First Civil War Reenactment (3/20/2014)

The Path to Self-Awareness (12/3/2013)

Monologue: Frankenstein Have Big Night Ahead of Frankenstein (10/31/2013)

I Earn Up to $300 a Day Making My Own Jewelry and Being a Prostitute! (7/1/2013)

By Day I’m an Omelet Chef, But By Night, I’m an Omelet Chef at Another Place (5/2/2013)

Haunted Hotel Ghosts Recount Their Most Disturbing Guest Stories (10/31/2012)

A Step-By-Step Guide to Building a Tiny Fucking Ship Inside a Tiny Fucking Bottle (8/23/2012)

An Automated Conference Call Moderator Gets Real (7/31/2012)

I’m the Distorted Security Code Standing Between You and This Web Page (5/17/2012)

The Ultimate Guide to Writing Better Than You Normally Do (4/10/2012)

Who’s Your Ear, Nose & Throat Doctor? (8/1/2011)

Welcome to Paradise (6/15/2011)

My Self-Portrait (1/25/2011)

Coat Drive (1/4/2011)

It’s Naked Time (6/23/2010)

We Are the Family In the Photo That Came With Your New Picture Frame (5/17/2010)

It’s Weird to Think That One Day I’ll Photoshop You Out of These Very Vacation Photos (8/12/2009)

I Am Poseidon! God of the Sea! I Also Teach Water Aerobics On Saturdays (6/10/2009)

Meth-Lab Feng Shui (4/7/2009)

Diary of a Woman Trapped Inside a Man’s Body Trapped Inside a Beaver’s Body (10/13/2008)

Monologue: It Was I Who Flipped Over the Risk Board Last Night (6/10/2008)

Advanced Tai Chi Exercises for the Modern World (12/10/2007)

Good News: A Seat On My Tandem Bicycle Just Opened Up (10/22/2007)

Monologue: Eulogy for a Bearded Bee Guy (7/20/2007)

McSweeney’s is a publishing company based in San Francisco.
As well as operating a daily humor website, we also publish Timothy McSweeney’s Quarterly Concern, the Believer, and an ever-growing selection of books under various imprints. You can buy all of these things from our online store. We’re also transitioning to a nonprofit and would greatly appreciate your help. You can support us today by making a donation.