A McSweeney’s Kickstarter Update!

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We need a little over 100 more backers (at any amount—even $1!) in order to get an additional $20,000 from MailChimp. Their support is within reach—and will go a long way toward helping us get more great writing into the world—but we need everyone’s help to get there! If you’ve already backed this campaign, your pledge will count toward the backer challenge. We can’t thank you enough for supporting us!

Visit our Kickstarter page to pledge your support.

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ARTICLES BY
Kate Hahn

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Welcome to the Federal Department of Outrage (2/18/2015)

List: The Most Boring Clue Results Ever (1/19/2015)

Black Friday Special: Common Retail Questions Answered With Deeper Questions (11/28/2014)

I Am Going to Start Ending Every Sentence With “Bitches,” Bitches (10/6/2014)

Monologue: Botticelli’s Venus Wants You to Go Away (9/12/2014)

Your Uber Driver Reviews You (7/14/2014)

List: Summer Motivations Group Fitness Class Instructors Can Yell in Place of, “It’s Bikini Season!” (7/3/2014)

The Loch Ness Monster is My Soulmate (2/14/2014)

Pottery Barn Catalogue Descriptions Written by an Aspiring Crime Novelist (10/30/2013)

Come See Our Home Equity! (10/11/2013)

List: The Ultimate Small Plates Tasting Menu (9/30/2013)

Monologue: A Farewell Speech From the Monopoly Iron (2/8/2013)

A Guide to Oahu’s Best Beaches By a Burned Out Freelance Travel Writer (1/7/2013)

Endings for the 1982 Film, An Officer and a Gentleman, If It Came Out in Today’s Factory-Free America (1/30/2012)

Monkey Business. (9/16/2011)

I’m Your Mixologist (6/27/2011)

How Much Do You Care About the Royal Wedding? (4/25/2011)

List: Gaius Julius CaesarStone™ Introduces the Roman Patriot Collection: New Countertop Colors for Spring 49 BC (3/17/2011)

Ice Safety (2/10/2011)

After You Hit a Home Run: A Guide for Major League Baseball Players (10/22/2010)

Nobody Puts Baby in a Corner (Most of the Time, Anyway) (9/17/2010)

Thrill Ride Alternatives for the Anxious (7/1/2010)

The Long Island Smoke Monster Speaks Out About Lost (5/4/2010)

That’s Where the Money Is (3/22/2010)

Diary of a Late Winter Romance (3/3/2010)

Currier and Ives Prints Updated for the 21st Century (12/21/2009)

Godzilla’s Food, Exercise, And Dream Diary (11/17/2009)

The Emotional Hokey Pokey (11/5/2009)

List: George W. Bush’s Retirement To-Do List Regarding the Gophers on Crawford Ranch (10/8/2009)

Advice for America as it Faces the End of Empire (From the Entity Formerly Known as the British Empire) (9/22/2009)

Scrabble Letters Explain How They Are Coping in the Economic Downturn (5/1/2009)

Summer Safety Tips: How to Avoid a Lion Attack (7/3/2008)

The Magic 8 Ball Amended by My Mother for My Middle-School Years (5/9/2008)

Tripadvisor.Com Reviews: Jekyll & Hyde B&B (11/17/2006)

American Girl Dolls Write To President Bush (9/14/2006)

More Sections Of The New York Times That Help Terrorists (7/5/2006)

Secret Shoppers Report On The U.S. Senate (6/20/2006)

Utopian Endings For Reality Shows (5/23/2006)

Reinventing The Mojito (4/28/2006)

Six Breakfast Cereals Argue Why They Should Replace Cheerios As The Preferred Finger Food For Babies (2/21/2006)

List: The Mall’s Banana Republics for the New Millennium (6/24/2005)

McSweeney’s is a publishing company based in San Francisco.
As well as operating a daily humor website, we also publish Timothy McSweeney’s Quarterly Concern, the Believer, and an ever-growing selection of books under various imprints. You can buy all of these things from our online store. We’re also transitioning to a nonprofit and would greatly appreciate your help. You can support us today by donating to our Kickstarter campaign.