“I’ll be dead by the time I die, so the estate tax isn’t really my problem.”

“Frankly, I have never been there, so who’s to know for sure that there’s a country called ‘Iran.’”

“The opioid epidemic may be killing hundreds of thousands, but it’s un-American to deny Purdue Pharma their right to make millions.”

“How could there be a gun violence problem if nobody’s shooting at me right now?”

“No need to hurricane-proof your house — there are other houses.”

“It is absolutely out of line for a doctor to tell a patient that if they want to live, they have to change their eating and exercise habits.”

“Just because people commit murder doesn’t mean that they can stop committing murder.”

“As a Michigan fan, I refuse to accept the existence of Ohio State.”

“Doctors say that smoking causes cancer, but I think I’ll stick with the lobbyists on this one.”

“What good does a ‘Treaty of Versailles’ do for the United States? Versailles is in France, libtards.”

“Why would an abortion doctor know anything about abortion and doctors?”

“A border wall is too costly to be practical, and telling private property owners what to do with their land is heinous government overreach.”