The Believer Magazine
Articles by
Sarah Totton
Sarah Totton’s work has appeared at McSweeney’s, Points in Case, Little Old Lady Comedy, Slackjaw, The Belladonna, and 251. She has won (dis)honorable mentions in The Bulwer Lytton Fiction Contest, The Lyttle Lytton Contest, and the Wergle Flomp Humor Poetry Contest.
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April 29, 2021If Libraries Were Run Like Used Car Dealerships
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March 10, 2021Help, I Live in a Quiet English Village Where Nothing Ever Happens!
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April 23, 2020Reviews of New Food: Post Tim Hortons Timbits Cereal (Chocolate Glazed Flavored & Birthday Cake Flavored)
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May 7, 2019Key Ring Chronicles: Cow Key
Trending 🔥
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March 10, 2025As an American Jew, I Feel Completely Reassured for My Safety Now That Trump Has Targeted the Epicenter of American Antisemitism, Columbia University
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March 6, 2025Killing Baby Boomers Will Save the United States Government Trillions
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March 5, 2025Short Conversations with Poets: Dong Li
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March 7, 2025Happy National Women’s Day from the White House
Recently
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March 14, 2025A Memorandum from the Newly Established Department of Grammar Efficiency
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March 14, 2025Excerpts from The Believer: An Interview with Michael Smith
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March 14, 2025Nothing Stands Between Us Teachers and the Brainwashing of America’s Children, Except This Beef Jerky in the Pencil Sharpener
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March 13, 2025It’s a Shame We Have to Betray Our Allies, Starve the Poor, Halt Scientific Progress, Destroy the Environment, and Eliminate the Freedoms Enshrined in the Bill of Rights, but at Least My Investment Portfolio Is Also Tanking