CARNAC: The novel as an art form; God; our nation’s idealism in the face of disaster abroad.
ED McMAHON: The novel as an art form; God; our nation’s idealism in the face of disaster abroad?
(Carnac opens the envelope and pulls out the card.)
CARNAC: Name three things that are dead forever.
ED McMAHON: Yes. Absolutely. That is absolutely right, Carnac.
- – - -
CARNAC: Sizzle, hiss, “I have failed you, Satan.”
ED McMAHON: Sizzle, hiss, “I have failed you, Satan”?
(Carnac opens the envelope and pulls out the card.)
CARNAC: The sound a Congressman makes when he is splashed with holy water.
ED McMAHON: Ha ha. That is so true. Subhuman filth, all of them. It makes me sick.
- – - -
CARNAC: The Jack Abramoff scandal, or a 72 at Augusta.
ED McMAHON: The Jack Abramoff scandal, or a 72 at Augusta?
(Carnac opens the envelope and pulls out the card.)
CARNAC: Par for the course.
ED McMAHON: Yes, Carnac. Our government is bought and sold by crooks, every day—could not agree more.
- – - -
CARNAC: The cries of an Iraqi child trapped beneath a pile of rubble; the sane voice of Richard Clarke in the Bush administration before 9/11; prayers to God.
ED McMAHON: The cries of an Iraqi child trapped beneath a pile of rubble; the sane voice of Richard Clarke in the Bush administration before 9/11; prayers to God?
(Carnac opens the envelope and pulls out the card.)
CARNAC: Name three things that go unheard.
ED McMAHON: Right on, Carnac. Right on. We are alone in the universe, absolutely.
- – - -
CARNAC: … Nothing. I’ve got—I’m getting nothing.
ED McMAHON: What do you mean?
CARNAC: I mean, I’m not getting a psychic reading. I’ve got nothing.
ED McMAHON: Nothing?
(Carnac opens the envelope and pulls out the card.)
CARNAC: What is the meaning of life?
(The crowd groans.)
CARNAC: Oh, go f*** yourselves.