Archive

The Terrible Things I Have Said and Done My Entire Life, and Right Up Until a Few Days Ago, Do Not Represent Me As a Person

I Believe We Can Heal Our Partisan Divide If You Just Admit Gravity Is Real

Drake Songs or 16th-Century Lutenist John Dowland Parlor Bops with Which to Court Your Desired After This Foul Plague Hath Passed?

Fuck Off, Dad! We’re Eating Apple Jacks

Interviews with People Who Have Interesting or Unusual Jobs: Brett Payne, Mystery Shopping at the Roller Rink

I Am Dr. Frankenstein, and I Condemn the Actions of the Monster I Created and Did Nothing to Stop

Basic Math Rules That Do Not Apply to Real Life

“I Just Love Winter,” Said the Man from Northern California

Punxsutawney Phil Dumps His High School Crush Via Voicemail

Five Signs Your Fiddle-Leaf Fig Plant Is Actually Yen-Lo-Wang, the Chinese God of Death

An Airbnb Listing Written by My Mom to Me

I’m Robby Frost and These Are My Dank Ass Poems