Which of the following movements is not a part of my funny cowboy dance?

  • The galloping in place with eyes crossed.
  • The pretending to lasso something that pulls you off your feet.
  • The acting like your rear end is on fire and trying to put it out with your cowboy hat.
  • The tiptoe prance.
  • The agitated leg while the other leg is straight.
  • The bow-legged forward scoot.
  • The fake running off balance in place.
  • Slapping the sole of your cowboy boot and then pretending like your hand is stuck to it.
  • The “cowboy peek-a-boo.”
  • The pretending to chew tobacco and spit into an imaginary spittoon, making a ka-ting sound.
  • The high-steppin’ arm swing.
  • The balancing on your heels and pivoting your toes outward.
  • The tipping your hat to a lady in the audience then fanning yourself because she’s so sexy.
  • The pretending to pull out two six-guns and twirl them forward and backward.
  • Doing the splits and then pretending you hurt yourself.
  • Jumping up on a dining table, kicking off the flowers and the fruit bowl, then sashaying from one end of the table to the other.

ANSWER: It was a trick quiz. They’re all part of the dance.

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Jack Handey’s latest book is Please Stop the Deep Thoughts available through DeepThoughtsByJack Handey.com.