Articles by
Ben Joseph
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November 18, 2013James Bernthal, Five-Year-Old Realtor
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February 5, 2009What Parents Must Assume I’m Saying to My Youth Soccer Team
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June 16, 2008Lit 101 Class in Three Lines or Less
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April 9, 2008Film School in Three Lines or Less
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March 25, 2008It’s Not You, It’s Your Uncontrollable Telekinesis
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December 21, 2007Excerpts From My Rejected Script: Alien Vs. Predator Save Christmas
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October 19, 2006Celebrity Biographies Written By A Guy Who Cannot Distinguish Fiction From Reality
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April 4, 2018Fifty-Six Questions for Young MC Upon Hearing “Bust a Move” for the First Time in Twenty-Two Years
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April 10, 2018List: Horoscopes for Librarians
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March 19, 2018I’m Going to Close This Deal Using Business Words I’ve Heard Men Yell in Airports
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April 6, 2018We Deeply Regret Hiring the Perpetrators of the Salem Witch Trials as Opinion Columnists
Recently
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April 19, 2018A Poem About Your University’s Absolute and Unwavering Appreciation of Its Faculty in Spite of Said Faculty’s Crap Salaries
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April 19, 2018List: Things I, an Affluent White Cis Male, Have Gotten Away With In a Starbucks
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April 19, 2018The Diary of a Settler of Catan
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April 18, 2018The First Female President