Listen, folks, you’re either ready to reap this freaky-assed harvest or you’re not. Subscribe to our National Magazine Award-winning Quarterly this week, and get our ever-popular decorative gourd mug absolutely free.
Colin Fisher is an actor and writer living in New York City. His writing has been featured on McSweeney’s Internet Tendency, Splitsider, and his illustrious YouTube channel. His dog is relatively famous.