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Articles by
Jason M. Mustian
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December 21, 2010I Swear to Fucking God, If I Come Home This Christmas and Find Out My Parents are Still Unplugging Their Computer From the Wall When They Want to Turn It Off, I Will Fucking Snap
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January 21, 2010My Roommate’s Apparent Step-By-Step Method For Turning Off My Alarm Clock When I’m Out Of Town
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January 14, 2022What Your Favorite Sad Dad Band Says About You
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January 5, 2022A Note of Reassurance from Your School District Regarding Our Updated Omicron Policies
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December 31, 2021Oh My Fucking God, Get the Fucking Vaccine Already, You Fucking Fucks
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January 10, 2022How We Will Separate You from Any Lingering Hope and Other Important Topics of Today’s Faculty Meeting
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January 25, 2022The Biggest Issue Facing America Right Now Is People Stealing Puffy Jackets from Multi-Billion Dollar Corporations
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January 25, 2022Mrs. Dalloway Said She Would Buy the Rapid COVID Test Herself
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January 24, 2022“We Need to Get Back to Normal,” I Say, While I Continue to Live My Life Normally, As I Have Throughout This Pandemic
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January 24, 2022The Nine Months of Pregnancy, Ranked from Worst to Best