Articles by
Jesse Eisenberg
Jesse Eisenberg is an actor and author of the plays The Spoils, The Revisionist, and Asuncion and the short story collection, Bream Gives Me Hiccups, which began as a McSweeney’s column.
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January 25, 2017My Very Good Friend
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November 4, 2016
Self-Deprecating Heroes -
December 12, 2013Bream Gives Me Hiccups: Restaurant Reviews from a Privileged Nine-Year-Old: The Ashram and Mom
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November 12, 2013Alexander Graham Bell’s First Five Phone Calls
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November 1, 2013Bream Gives Me Hiccups: Restaurant Reviews from a Privileged Nine-Year-Old: The Museum of Natural History and Making Compromises
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October 2, 2013A Post Gender Normative Woman Tries to Pick Up a Man at a Bar
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August 6, 2013Bream Gives Me Hiccups: Restaurant Reviews from a Privileged Nine-Year-Old: A Crawfish Boil and Dad’s New Family
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June 3, 2013Bream Gives Me Hiccups: Restaurant Reviews from a Privileged Nine-Year-Old: Fuddruckers and an Unreliable New Friend
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February 22, 2013Bream Gives Me Hiccups: Restaurant Reviews from a Privileged Nine-Year-Old: Matthew’s House
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December 11, 2012Body Rituals Among the Lauxesortem
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November 21, 2012Bream Gives Me Hiccups: Restaurant Reviews from a Privileged Nine-Year-Old: Thanksgiving With Vegans
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October 2, 2012Bream Gives Me Hiccups: Restaurant Reviews from a Privileged Nine-Year-Old: Organix vs. the San Gennaro Street Festival
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August 17, 2017As Your Doctor, I Am Protesting the Removal of Your Tumor Because I Don’t Want to Erase Your Medical History
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August 3, 2017And God Created Millennial Earth
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August 9, 2017I’m a Google Manufacturing Robot and I Believe Humans Are Biologically Unfit to Have Jobs in Tech
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July 31, 2017Please Forgive Us at Blue Apron for This Week’s Meals. We’ve Been Having a Tough Time Lately
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August 18, 2017I Mean, I Can’t Even With This Solar Eclipse
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August 18, 2017The Alt-Left’s Radical Agenda
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August 18, 2017Monologue: I’m Ivanka Trump, and I Cannot Believe You Fucking Morons Keep Falling for My Bullshit
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August 18, 2017List: 7 Outfits That Will Tell Your Therapist How You Really Feel