McSWEENEY'S INTERNET TENDENCY'S PATREON
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Articles by
Jesse Eisenberg
Jesse Eisenberg is an actor and author of the plays The Spoils, The Revisionist, and Asuncion, as well as the short story collection, Bream Gives Me Hiccups:https://www.mcsweeneys.net/columns/bream-gives-me-hiccups-restaurant-reviews-from-a-privileged-nine-year-old, which began as a McSweeney’s column.
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January 3, 2019My Sister Pushes the Lobster
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May 18, 2018One Small Blow Against Encroaching Totalitarianism: The Natural Order of the World Depends On It
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January 25, 2017My Very Good Friend
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November 4, 2016Self-Deprecating Heroes
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December 12, 2013Bream Gives Me Hiccups: Restaurant Reviews from a Privileged Nine-Year-Old: The Ashram and Mom
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November 12, 2013Alexander Graham Bell’s First Five Phone Calls
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November 1, 2013Bream Gives Me Hiccups: Restaurant Reviews from a Privileged Nine-Year-Old: The Museum of Natural History and Making Compromises
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October 2, 2013A Post Gender Normative Woman Tries to Pick Up a Man at a Bar
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August 6, 2013Bream Gives Me Hiccups: Restaurant Reviews from a Privileged Nine-Year-Old: A Crawfish Boil and Dad’s New Family
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June 3, 2013Bream Gives Me Hiccups: Restaurant Reviews from a Privileged Nine-Year-Old: Fuddruckers and an Unreliable New Friend
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February 22, 2013Bream Gives Me Hiccups: Restaurant Reviews from a Privileged Nine-Year-Old: Matthew’s House
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December 11, 2012Body Rituals Among the Lauxesortem
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November 13, 2024Sure, I Voted for Someone Whose Policies Might Kill You, but Now’s the Time to Put Aside Our Differences
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December 3, 2024A Faculty Member’s Self-Evaluation at the End of the Semester
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November 18, 2024I Am a Passionate Mid-Level University Administrator, and I’m Gonna Administrate the Shit Out of This Place
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November 25, 2024How to Give Thanks by Cooking Food No One Knows How to Cook and Eating Food No One Likes to Eat