Articles by
Joe O'Neill
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February 9, 2005List: Titles From the Hockey-Lockout Erotica Library
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October 6, 2004Unsuccessful Movie-Merchandising Attempts
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September 10, 2004List: Proposed Titles for a Remake of Bend It Like Beckham, Using Croatian Players in the Titles
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August 31, 2004Saddam Hussein, Master of the Limerick
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July 6, 2004List: What’s Up Next for Jack Layton’s Mustache?
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July 7, 2001List: Lines to be Relayed by a Servile Yet Dignified Waiter to an Interesting-Looking Woman in a Public Place
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July 7, 2001List: Responses from the Lady, To Be Relayed by That Same Servile Yet Dignified Waiter
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April 4, 2018Fifty-Six Questions for Young MC Upon Hearing “Bust a Move” for the First Time in Twenty-Two Years
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April 10, 2018List: Horoscopes for Librarians
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March 19, 2018I’m Going to Close This Deal Using Business Words I’ve Heard Men Yell in Airports
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April 6, 2018We Deeply Regret Hiring the Perpetrators of the Salem Witch Trials as Opinion Columnists
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April 19, 2018A Poem About Your University’s Absolute and Unwavering Appreciation of Its Faculty in Spite of Said Faculty’s Crap Salaries
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April 19, 2018List: Things I, an Affluent White Cis Male, Have Gotten Away With In a Starbucks
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April 19, 2018The Diary of a Settler of Catan
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April 18, 2018The First Female President