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AWARDS!

McSweeney’s Quarterly is a finalist for the 2020 National Magazine Award for Fiction!

Articles by

Kimberly Bollard

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Kimberly Bollard is a NYC actress and comedian. Her articles have been published by Reductress and RobotButt. She also runs her own satire Instagram page, @caktusclan. She went viral on YouTube back in 2013 for playing a tasteful rendition of Riskay’s “Smell Yo Dick” on the ukulele.

June 21, 2019

4 High-Waisted Swimsuits That Say “My Belly Button Is a Prize Only My Husband Can Gaze Upon”

by Kimberly Bollard

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February 19, 2020

Self-Care Tips for Toddlers

by Shannon J. Curtin
February 21, 2020

Jokes I’ve Told That My Male Colleagues Didn’t Like

by Ali Kelley, Kate Herzlin, Danielle Kraese, and Ysabel Yates
February 12, 2020

Who Said It: Mike Bloomberg or Lucille Bluth?

by Laura Slade Lewis
February 12, 2016

The Pagan Origins of Valentine’s Day

by Kathryn Doyle

Recently

February 24, 2020

Waiting for Dodo: Conversations With My Baby About His Refusal to Sleep Comprised Entirely of Quotes From Waiting For Godot

by Danny Coleman
February 24, 2020

Famous Quotes From Philosophers If They Had Spent $9 for a Bottle of Juice

by Rima Parikh
February 24, 2020

I Hate Trump’s Awful Policies, But I Love That He’s a Huge Asshole

by Teddy Wayne
February 21, 2020

Aww, Our Newborn Baby Is So Beautiful… Right?

by Kristen Mulrooney