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Articles by
Madeline Goetz
Madeline Goetz is a researcher for Late Night & a writer for earlier in the night. She lives in New York with her collie, Oskar, in an apartment she really can’t afford.
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September 21, 2022Welcome to Our Cul-De-Sac
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February 28, 2022I Don’t Speak on Behalf of Other Politicians, Which Is a Practice I Definitely Didn’t Just Make Up to Avoid Talking about Trump Praising Putin
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February 11, 2022The Totally Normal and Perfectly Legal Ways We Stored Official White House Documents
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February 4, 2022Odyssey Cruise Lines Now Offering Competitive Rate of $21 an Hour for a Ten-Year Adventure
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September 3, 2021Do Not Feed the Duck—You Will Only Enable Him
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March 5, 2021Why I’m Selling My 4-Bed, 3-Bath, 37-Moving-Bookcase Home
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January 24, 2023Macroeconomic Changes Have Made It Impossible for Me to Want to Pay You
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May 13, 2022Ten Possibilities the Applebee’s Waitress Considers Before It Occurs to Her the Women in Booth Fourteen Might Be a Couple with Two Children
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January 10, 2023Fifteen Long-Overdue Slang Terms for Female Masturbation
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October 30, 2009Letters From the Hellbox: Caslon, Baskerville, and Franklin: Revolutionary Types
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February 3, 2023Our New AP African-American Studies Course Will Cover Black History from January 1996 to December 1996
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February 3, 2023FAQ: Is My Child Eating Enough Pirate’s Booty?
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February 3, 2023I’m the Kid from The Red Balloon, and That Thing Over Montana Is Not from China
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February 2, 2023Two People Who Don’t Have Cable TV Talk About How They Don’t Have Cable TV, and How Great That Makes Them