Articles by
Matthew Simmons
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July 19, 2007List: Two Things That Aren’t Covered by Your Friend With Benefits
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May 12, 2005List: Things Heard During John Cage’s Folsom Prison Performance of “4’33”."
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May 10, 2005List: Three Items at the Supermarket I See in a New Way, Now That I’ve Read Some Books on Literary Theory
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February 16, 2005List: Ways Jesus Saves
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September 13, 2004This Bible You Sold Me Is Clearly Defective and I’d Like to Return It, Please
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November 6, 2003List: Why Love Is Blind
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August 21, 2003List: Things I Would Say to Dorothy Parker If I Was Her Boyfriend that Would Lead to a Huge Fight
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June 6, 2018Open Letter: An Open Letter to White Women Concerning The Handmaid’s Tale and America’s Cultural Amnesia
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June 12, 2018Whole30 Changed My Entire Relationship With Food Because I’m Dead Now
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June 8, 2018List: What Your Musical Instrument Says About You
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February 24, 2011List: What Your Favorite Classic Rock Band Says About You
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June 19, 2018McSweeney’s Books Previews: An Interview With Daniel Gumbiner, Author of The Boatbuilder
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June 19, 2018My Coming Out Story, Sponsored By Bank of America
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June 18, 2018Monologue: Angela Chase from My So-Called Life, 39, Announces Bid for Congress
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June 18, 2018List: The Freelancer’s Hierarchy of Favors