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Articles by
Ralph Gamelli
Ralph Gamelli has been published at The Morning News and other places. He’s an associate editor at The Big Jewel.
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December 21, 2017Winterize Your Home
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February 27, 2017Filling Out Your Harrison Ford Aircraft Incident Report
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April 25, 2014Cosmos: Anti-Science Discussion Group Questions
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January 11, 2013RE: Your Robot Army
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October 31, 2012The Party Bus of Death: FAQ
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May 31, 2011Items I’ll Need To Exact My Revenge
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May 24, 2010Miraculous Tales of Survival: Hypochondriac’s Edition
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September 4, 2009How to Survive an Encounter With Me
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December 31, 2008The Stick, Recently Inducted Into the Toy Hall of Fame, Is Now Available at Amazon.com
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April 4, 2008The Most Dangerous Game: New Times, New Rules
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January 30, 2008The Invisible Man Is Innocent
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April 11, 2007We Have Ways to Make You Talk
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February 19, 2021I’m a Short Afternoon Walk and You’re Putting Way Too Much Pressure on Me
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February 22, 2021The UX on this Small Child Is Terrible
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February 16, 2021As a Superhero Teacher, I Can’t Wait to Sacrifice My Unvaccinated Life for Your Child
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February 24, 2021I Oppose the Democrats’ Plan to Lower Child Poverty. If Kids Want to Eat, They Should Work In Filthy Factories Like They Did in the Good Old Days
Recently
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February 26, 2021The Cure’s “Friday I’m in Love” for Nihilists
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February 26, 2021As a Staunch Defender of American Liberty, I Refuse to Let Trans People Infringe on My Rights as a White, Straight, Cisgender Congresswoman from Georgia
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February 26, 2021You’re Having a Bad Trip, Charlie Brown!
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February 25, 2021714 Epidemiologists on When We Can Resume Fixating on Petty Bullshit