SPECIAL DECORATIVE-GOURD-RELATED PROMOTION!

Become a McSweeney’s Internet Tendency patron at $10 (or more) a month, and receive a free It’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers tote bag. (Offer ends October 1st.)

I Like Big Brass and I Cannot Lie: Confessions from the Tuba World

Elizabeth Eshelman grew up in a family of tuba players and staged her grand rebellion by majoring in English instead of music. It was too late, though; by college, she’d already been playing the tuba for six years, and now, several years out from an MFA in fiction, she’s at work on a novel about love, vocation, the meaning of life, and—the tuba world. She can’t help it. It’s genetic.