Teddy Wayne is the author of the novels Kapitoil and The Love Song of Jonny Valentine.
BY TEDDY WAYNE
The early bird gets the worm, like Chris in international sales, who gets to the office a couple minutes before nine every morning, so it looks like he’s this real go-getter to David, but he always leaves at five on the dot, whereas I have delayed sleep-phase disorder and have greater sleep requirements than the average person, so I have trouble making it in by 9:15, but I’m constantly staying till seven or eight, yet I’m discriminated against even though I’m working much more overall than Chris, and if we just had a work structure in place to accommodate people like me, then the late bird would get the worm and the brown-nosing early bird would be the one getting talked to by David on a monthly basis.
SUGGESTED READSHow to Make Your Own Proverbs
by Russell Bradbury-Carlin (1/8/2004)
List: Rethinking Horse Proverbs
by Joseph O'Brien (5/3/2004)
Obscure Chinese Proverbs
by Dennis Mahoney (11/9/2004)
RECENTLYThe Association for the Study of Romantic Letters Presents the First Annual Conference On How to Tell Samantha I Really Like Her
by Jason Edward Harrington (7/28/2014)
Hungover Bear and Friends: Saved By Criticism
by Ali Fitzgerald (7/28/2014)
Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Hay
by Teddy Wayne (7/28/2014)