“Go try to be funny nowadays with this woke culture… There were articles written about why comedies don’t work anymore—I’ll tell you why, because all the fucking funny guys are like, ‘Fuck this shit, because I don’t want to offend you.’" – Director Todd Phillips on why he doesn’t make comedies anymore, Vanity Fair

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Remember jokes? Real, good ol’ fashioned jokes? I do. Nowadays they’re called “offensive” or “racist” or “not funny” but let me tell you, they were jokes alright. We used to tell ‘em, and people used to hear ’em, and that’s what happened. There was none of this PC, SJW, CVS mumbo jumbo. Just provocative and fresh points of view dating back to the 1800s.

Comedy is meant to be raw, and I’m sorry if me saying sorry offends you, but if it did offend you then maybe you should be saying sorry to me? Because you’re the ones who killed comedy. You know who you are, with your outrage and your “your jokes aren’t funny” and “you are incredibly tedious.” Well, if I’m not funny then what do you call 300 views on Barstool Sports? Exactly. If anyone’s suffering, it’s guys like us. We were doing fine before everyone else showed up and decided to kick us out of comedy. Do you know what it’s like to be kicked out of a place you thought was home? Well, I do, as of very recently. And let me tell you, it is not rad, like at all.

You took away my right to use the same tired racial stereotypes I’ve been using for years. Mocking other races has been passed down for generations and now you’re telling us it’s “boring” and “racist.” Do you know how that feels to be called a “racist”? It hurts. How can I be a racist, or a sexist, or a homophobe, or a transphobe when I make jokes about everyone on that list? I’m an “equal opportunity offender” hahahahah!


He’s called the JOKER not the WOKER.


You see that would have fucking KILLED six weeks ago on my podcast. But now it’s dead, comedy is dead, and all because you’re hurt, well guess what? Jokes are meant to fucking hurt, why do you think it’s called a punchline?

I hope you’re happy! Because you’ll never hear my refined ethnic accents, or rape jokes, or me saying the n-word ever again! So who’s the real loser here?

RIP, comedy.

Also, check out tickets for my 60 date tour “#TRIGGERED” starting next month.