Go ahead, laugh at Emmanuel Lewis. Laugh all you want. Okay, you can stop now. No, really, cut it out. Certainly, the tiny former TV star may not seem like a serious personage. But perhaps all of it — the role on Webster, the subsequent decline from the public eye, the occasional tabloid story — has all been a ruse, designed to keep the American public from discovering the truth: that Emmanuel Lewis has been single-handedly managing the nation’s economy for over twenty years. Think about it: Let’s say that you’re the greatest economic genius the world has yet produced. And yet, you’re doomed to always look like an adorable ten-year-old. Do you attempt to become chairman of the Fed all by yourself? Or do you hire a series of amiable character actors to play the role of the Fed chief, all the while quietly pulling the strings behind the scenes, conveniently arranging a TV role for yourself to explain the vast riches you’re accumulating? Think about it.
July 23, 1999