She said she’d take Ella’s voice,
The pixie frame of that Broadway dancer,
Maybe the anatomy of Heidi Klum,
And Frank O’Hara’s charisma.
She’d be a poet. And live in New York City.
She’d be a flirt. She’d be young.

I said, “I think I’ll sleep around. I’m not afraid of dying young.
I’ll even take out an ad in the Village Voice
Saying, ‘Hey, hot town, New Girl in the City
With the flexibility and endurance of a dancer.’
But who needs an ad when you have Clinton’s charisma?
And I can always buy the body of Heidi Klum.”

She said, “We shouldn’t feed the pressure to clone Heidi Klum.
We should inspire girls who, like lambs, are tender and young.
Let’s start a magazine for women and call it Charisma,
which will be like Allure but with an edgier voice!
Its audience will be the corporate, single-mom dancer
Who loves the rock-and-roll on which we built this city.”

I says, "Fuck that, I’m goin’ to Oklahoma City,
Movin’ in with my best friend, Heidi Klum.
I’ll work as Tina Turner’s backup dancer
Or remake “Tambourine Man” with Neil Young.
I’ll attend OU and major in voice.
I don’t got talent but I sure got charisma."

She said, “You’ll start a cult with all that David Koresh charisma.
You ought to make a pilgrimage to Vatican City.
You should repent. Finally hear the Lord’s voice.
You can change your name to Sister Mary Heidi Klum.
Commit your life to translating the works of Carl Jung
into Latin as penance for your days as a dancer.”

I said, “Look, you be the writer. Translate Tiny Dancer
Into rap, then sell it to Seventeen or Charisma.
I’m eating ice cream for breakfast and drinking wine while it’s young.
In the world’s most romantic city,
Amsterdam, hometown of Heidi Klum,
You’ll find me singing ‘My Way’ in an operatic voice.”

She said, “Your charisma has moved me. Although I’m not young,
I’ll be a line dancer in Salt Lake City,
If I can’t have the voice of Ella or the tits of Heidi Klum.”