Though immunized as a child, Snow White ran away at fourteen. Outreach was poor in the magical forest, and the dwarves had no knowledge of modern medicine. Later, a bad experience with a conventionally grown apple left Snow White with a strong belief in organic food, a suspicion of oppressive beauty standards, and a distrust of Big Pharma. Her blog, Snow White People: My Thoughts, Your Journey, gets over 70,000 unique hits per week. Snow White has polio.
The Wicked Stepmother followed the recommended vaccine schedule for her daughters, including HPV (“Prince Charming? Prince Sleazebag, more like. Be prepared, girls”). Cinderella was not vaccinated; though her stepmother feared the loss of valuable services to avoidable disease, Cinderella never left the house, so her risk was considered low. (“Herd immunity? We’re your herd. Get back to work.”)
Cinderella’s children are current on all shots, though she faces strong disapproval from palace courtiers who believe that vaccinations will turn their children into elves.
After the centerfold (“Hot, Healthy, and Toxin-Free”), Sleeping Beauty launched her popular WakeUp™! series of sponsored webinars (“Western Medicine: WakeUp™! to the Lies,” “WakeUp™! Your Brand: Leveraging Deeply Rooted Fears of Intellectual Disability For Greater Visibility,” “Conscious Parenting the Wakeup™! Way,” and “E-Cigarettes: WakeUp™! to Pleasure”). Her seventh memoir, Think Magically! My Charmed Life So Far, is forthcoming this fall.
The Little Mermaid
Before her transformation, the Little Mermaid was fully vaccinated against fin rot, fish dropsy, and starfish wasting disease. However, because of the standard post-spell waiting period, she could not be vaccinated against land diseases for six months, and she contracted the mumps during a royal outreach photo op at a local charter school. She has fully recovered.
Per Magic Kingdom policy for companion animals, Goofy is currently vaccinated against bordetella, leptospirosis, Parvo virus, and rabies.