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All posts tagged
vaccines
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June 22, 2022Is It Your First Summer After College or Did Your Toddler Just Become Eligible for the COVID-19 Vaccine?
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April 25, 2022Hiding Place Chosen by My Toddler, or Location Where She Is Invisible to People Making Decisions about U.S. COVID Policy?
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December 31, 2021Oh My Fucking God, Get the Fucking Vaccine Already, You Fucking Fucks
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December 30, 2021Vaccine Side Effect, or Have You Just Been Alive for 40 Years?
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December 29, 2021FAQ for Rushing Delta Delta Variant
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December 29, 2021A Short Quiz for My Students in Lieu of Asking About Their Vaccine Status or Requesting That They Wear Masks
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December 17, 2021Predicted Increase in Overall Vaccination Rates if COVID Variants Were Named After Steven Seagal Movies Instead of Greek Letters
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November 22, 2021Have You Been the Victim of a Vaccine Mandate? If So, You May Be Entitled
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October 22, 2021Actually, Sandworm Attacks Have Only a One Percent Death Rate
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October 19, 2021A Morally Injured Healthcare Worker’s Recommendations for Updating Your Advanced Medical Directives During the COVID-19 Pandemic
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June 28, 2022We Are an Anti-Abortion Couple, and Don’t Worry, We Will Adopt Your Baby
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June 17, 2021What Your Favorite ’90s Rock Band Says About the Type of Bored Suburban Dad You Are Today
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June 14, 2022My Favorite Controlled Substance Is Daycare
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January 14, 2022What Your Favorite Sad Dad Band Says About You
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July 1, 2022Laws Should Be Based Solely on the Words of Constitutional Authors Like Me, the Guy Who Died After Shoving a Piece of Whalebone in His Dick
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June 30, 2022I’d Rather Drag Your Lifeless Body from This Party Than Wait Here While You Go to the Bathroom
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June 30, 2022Your Kids Have Been Totally Off Screens and Playing Outside for the Entire Fifteen Minutes Before You Arrived to Pick Them Up
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June 30, 2022I Know What’s Best For You All Over the World: An IUD Called Aunty Fatima