With the BE’s favorite holiday fast approaching, we turn to an old Brain Exploder favorite. Each of the clues will contain a missing phrase which you will have to complete with a title, author, or character name from horror films or literature. The clue will include blanks showing the number of words needed to complete the pun, as well as (in parentheses) the number of words in the spooky name or title. For instance, the clue might be:
If “hark” is a command to listen, does that ____ _ ______ is a person who hears? (2).
That sentence can be completed with the words “mean a harker,” which is a reference to Mina Harker, the wife of Jonathan Harker, who is pursued so relentlessly by Dracula.
Send your answers by noon Friday. The winner of a McSweeney’s book will be chosen at random from all correct entries.
1. To decorate the gym with turn-of-the-century nostalgia, the prom committee needed an eye for ninety-seven, an ear for ninety-nine, and a ____ ___ _____-___. (1)
2. Classical music is like a drug to me. In fact you could say I’m a ______ _____. (2)
3. The rodeo clown must have had peanut butter on her cheek because she fell down on the job ___ _ ____ ______ ___. (2)
4. The couple packed a cloak and an Irish sweater for their November trip to Helsinki, asserting that a Percy can don flannel ___ _ ____ ___ ____ ____; _______ __ the autumn can be chilly. (5)
The answers were as follows:
1. To decorate the gym with turn-of-the-century nostalgia, the prom committee needed an eye for ninety-seven, an ear for ninety-nine, and a NOSE FOR AUGHT-TWO. (“Nosferatu”)
2. Classical music is like a drug to me. In fact, you could say I’m a BRAHMS TOKER. (Bram Stoker)
3. The rodeo clown must have had peanut butter on her cheek because she fell down on the job AND A BULL LICKED HER. (Hannibal Lecter)
4. The couple packed a cloak and an Irish sweater for their November trip to Helsinki, asserting that a Percy can don flannel AND A MARY CAN WEAR WOOL; FINLAND IN the autumn can be chilly. (“An American Werewolf in London”; extra credit for noting the reference to Percy Shelley and his wife Mary, the author of Frankenstein)
The following readers had all five answers correct, and the winner of a McSweeney’s book, chosen at random, is Mark Solan:
David L. Williams
If you just can’t wait for next Halloween, Bob Weisz sent in his own spooky “Phil” in the Blank. The answers can be found below.
1. It was the Warsaw man’s safe-cracking skills and the Istanbul man’s escape route that made the ____-____ _____ so successful. (1)
2. The college kid was so obsessed with her that he joined her Human Behavior class, even though he didn’t even ____ _______-ology. (2)
3. Ms. Rice was remembering that time in a Jerusalem diner when a hot-assed waitress made a pass at her. Unfortunately, the boss saw and he ______ ___ ______; ____ ______ ___ ____. (5)
4. The priest asked, “Do you, _______ _____, take Robin Ruzan to be your lawfully wedded wife?” and then thought about making an axe-murderer joke. (2)
Hope you enjoy.
(scroll down for the answers)
ANSWERS (with Bob’s comments):
1. Pole-Turk heist (This can either be Poltergeist, the horror movie, or Polter Keighst, the obscure author of the horror book, Sk8er Boi.)
2. like anthrop (Yeah, I know I only used half a word, but “lycanthrope” is such a cool word, and I’m pretty sure they made a shitty movie with that as the title.)
3. docked her shekel; Anne missed her hide (Nostalgia. Israel. Lesbianism. This one’s got it all.)
4. Michael Myers (you should’ve seen the list of axe-murderer jokes I had written up that were neither funny nor written up.)