1. Marissa is at a work dinner entertaining a group of important clients. Everyone is drinking, and things are going well when one of the male clients touches her under the table. Marissa isn’t sure if she should make a scene and risk losing these clients.

True or False: It is complete and utter bullshit that women are required to take this sexual harassment training given that we are the ones constantly being harassed.

2. For over a year, Amy has had to deal with her boss, Jeremy, calling her “sweetheart,” “honey,” and “doll.” This has continued despite several conversations with Jeremy.

Based on this situation, what training would actually be helpful for the women at this company?
A. Salary-negotiation training
B. Self-defense training
C. English lit course on the works of Jane Austen
D. How to remove exclamation points from emails while remaining friendly

3. Susan is a new manager, and one of her direct reports, Brad, accidentally sent her an email he intended to send to his friends. The email contained an article titled, “How to Deal With a Female Boss.”

How much sleep will Susan lose while she thinks through the appropriate way to handle blatant sexism?
A. 8 hours, nightly
B. 16 hours, spread randomly over the course of a year, whenever she is reminded of the incident
C. None, if you include the sleep she was already losing from the last time a male colleague commented on her being a better mom than an employee (which he claimed was a compliment)

4. Last week, Marianne was invited to a team happy hour. As they were leaving, she overheard her manager Josh say he was happy she was coming, because she had “beauty but not brains.” Marianne, wholly dispirited, careless of her appearance, and seeming equally indifferent whether she went or stayed, prepared without one look of hope or one expression of pleasure.

True or False: The prompt above was palatable because the second half of that passage was taken from a Jane Austen novel.

5. Sandra works in accounting. Every time her co-worker, Mark, sees her, he comments on her appearance. When she brought this to his attention, he replied, “You don’t know how to take a compliment.”

True or False: Women are still being paid 70 cents on the dollar to every man. Women are literally paid less money than men to take THIS training.

6. CBS News recently reported that 100% of women at this company are required to take this Sexual Harassment Training, while 100% of the people who committed sexual harassment were men.

Upon reading this, you feel comfortable publicly expressing:
A. Silent fits of rage
B. Polite fury
C. Lady-like indignation

7. Erica’s boss, Paul, is the head of marketing. One night, after most of her colleagues had left, Erica sees Paul leaning over the new intern’s desk, playing with her hair. The intern is visibly uncomfortable, but Paul shows no sign of stopping.

Instead of spending millions defending Paul’s inappropriate behavior, a better use of the company’s money would be:
A. Paid maternity leave
B. Tampons in the restroom
C. Fix the gender pay gap
D. Free pepper spray
E. All of the above

8. During a weekly 1:1, Brad thought his female manager, Susan, was hitting on him, so he confidently placed his hand on her thigh. When she asked him to remove it, he winked and replied, “I’m the boss now.”

Given that a curiously similar event recently happened at this company, which of your male colleagues is to be blamed for this newly mandatory sexual harassment training?
A. Todd
B. Todd
C. Todd
D. Todd
E. It was Todd (from Sales)