Articles by
Elana Spivack
Elana Spivack is a comedy writer and essayist. She once went on a date with Zach Braff.
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September 12, 2017Text Messages to a Young Poet
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April 6, 2017Monologue: Manic Pixie Dream Girls Anonymous
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January 12, 2017Monologue: I Tried to Order Coffee During a Date, But Had a Crisis About Systemic Bias Instead
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November 23, 2015List: The Evolution of “Netflix and Chill.”
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August 18, 2015Itinerary for the Road Trip to College with Your Parents
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April 4, 2018Fifty-Six Questions for Young MC Upon Hearing “Bust a Move” for the First Time in Twenty-Two Years
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April 10, 2018List: Horoscopes for Librarians
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March 19, 2018I’m Going to Close This Deal Using Business Words I’ve Heard Men Yell in Airports
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April 6, 2018We Deeply Regret Hiring the Perpetrators of the Salem Witch Trials as Opinion Columnists
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April 18, 2018The First Female President
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April 18, 2018List: Who Said It: Middle-Aged Woman or Teenage Boy?
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April 18, 2018My Commute and Workday as Described By Ancient Poets
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April 17, 2018List: 17 Words and Phrases You Can’t Spell without “Sean Hannity,” “Michael Cohen,” and “Donald Trump” Arranged in the Shape of a Small Phallus