The Believer Magazine
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November 22, 2022As a Direct Descendent of a Mayflower Pilgrim, Thanksgiving Means a Little More to Me, Bartholomew Dunston Ratbait IV
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April 30, 2020Citations for the Latest Rant That Guy Who You Sort of Knew In High School Just Posted On Facebook
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July 10, 2019Given the State of the World, I Wonder If It’s Wrong to Give Birth to the Son of Satan
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October 26, 2017P-Day: The Day America Found Out Trump’s Russian Video Was Real
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April 17, 2017A Guide for Talking to a Trump Supporter with Loving Empathy
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July 1, 2016America Finally Passes Meaningful Gun Control Legislation
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September 16, 2015Crossfit’s Film Critic Wins a 2018 National Magazine Award
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December 22, 2014A Father Releases the Financial Forecast for His Family Christmas
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October 31, 2014Here at Cline Family Country Cabin, We Do Things a Little Differently
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December 18, 2013Merry Christmas, Son. I Trampled a Man to Death to Buy You This LeapPad Ultra Tablet
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December 9, 2013Kirk Cameron Records the Audiobook Version of the Dinosaur Erotica Novel In the Velociraptor’s Nest
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July 17, 2012The Exquisite Freedoms of Michael P. Dodderman
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March 18, 2025Senator Schumer Votes to Let the Big Wooden Horse into Troy
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March 10, 2025As an American Jew, I Feel Completely Reassured for My Safety Now That Trump Has Targeted the Epicenter of American Antisemitism, Columbia University
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March 24, 2025Lest We Forget the Horrors: An Unending Catalog of Trump’s Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes
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March 13, 2025It’s a Shame We Have to Betray Our Allies, Starve the Poor, Halt Scientific Progress, Destroy the Environment, and Eliminate the Freedoms Enshrined in the Bill of Rights, but at Least My Investment Portfolio Is Also Tanking
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March 27, 2025We Are the People Who Buy Red Delicious Apples
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March 27, 2025A Letter from Believer Editor Daniel Gumbiner
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March 27, 2025Scenes from the First Major League Baseball Game Featuring the New Robot Umpire, HAL 9000 from 2001: A Space Odyssey
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March 26, 2025Excerpts from a Red-Hot Right-Wing Romance Novel