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Articles by
Luke Burns
Luke Burns is a writer whose work has been published by The New Yorker, New York Magazine, HAD, and in the books The Best of McSweeney’s Internet Tendency and Keep Scrolling Till You Feel Something. More at lukevburns.com.
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March 12, 2024An Excerpt from Pierre La Police’s Classic Comic Masters of the Nefarious
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May 4, 2023Yoda Botches Five Classic Jokes
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September 14, 2022The Secret to Great Writing Is Taking Dozens of Showers a Day
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June 18, 2020Celebrating the Hilarious Work of Brian Agler
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December 16, 2019Dr. Manhattan’s 12 Days of Christmas
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November 10, 2017Similes Involving Bad Similes
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February 9, 2015White Noise or White Noise?
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February 17, 2014Attempts to Find a Symbol for the Conflict Between My Screenplay’s Protagonist and Antagonist
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August 2, 2013Fragments from the Ancient Gospels of “The Church of a Pretty Good God.”
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May 13, 2013I’d Like To Take a Moment to Talk About the Plight of Drone Veterans
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December 19, 2012Audience Participation Cues for the My Dinner With André Midnight Madness Screening
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July 25, 2011The Birthday Clown Consortium Price Guide
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July 15, 2024I Can’t Believe Such a Hateful, Violent Act Could Happen in the Hateful, Violent Era I’ve Created
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July 12, 2024Schedule of Speakers for the 2024 Republican National Convention
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July 16, 2024Hillbilly Elegy Edited for J. D. Vance’s Vice Presidential Campaign
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May 10, 2024What Your Favorite ’90s Band Says About the Kind of Bored Suburban Mom You Are Today
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July 26, 2024I’m a Childless Cat Lady, and If Trump and Vance Win I’m Going to Start a Sexual Relationship with My Couch
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July 26, 2024Skills You Need as President of the United States or Skills You Need as a Stepmom?
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July 26, 2024If They’d Told Me We Were Poor, I Wouldn’t Have Tolerated the Cynics
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July 26, 2024We Went Ahead and Made an AI Olympian