McSweeney’s Advent Calendar 2024 Table of Contents
Book One: Snopes Investigates the Anderson Family’s Holiday Letter by Allen Rein
Book Two: Guidelines for Female Protagonists in Hallmark Christmas Movies by Madeline Trebenski
Book Three: On the Subject of Tuesdays by Ikechukwu Ufomadu (originally published as a letter in McSweeney’s Issue 70)
Book Four: As I Lay Buying by Marco Kaye
Book Five: Sun Tzu: The Art of the War On Christmas by Jamie Cricks
Book Six: Ayn Rand Writes Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer by Jennie Egerdie
Book Seven: Keep Out by Jon McNaught (a comic originally published in McSweeney’s Issue 61)
Book Eight: Yes, The Silence of the Lambs Is a Christmas Movie by Gary M Almeter
Book Nine: Herr Drosselmeyer, it Grieves Me to Disinvite You and Your Nutcracker From Future Holiday Parties by Audrey Burges
Book Ten: Mary Bailey’s Christmas Week To-Do List by Sarah Schmelling
Book Eleven: The 100 Percent True Story of Santa and Jesus, Probably by John Moe and Charlie Moe
Book Twelve: Selections from Bus Poems 1 and II Plus by Sasha Pearl (excerpted from poems originally published in McSweeney’s Issue 67)
Book Thirteen: A Romance Novelist Desperately Tries to Romanticize Midwestern Winter by Mary Spencer
Book Fourteen: Mariah Carey’s “All I Want For Christmas” as Written by Walt Whitman by Maggie Downs
Book Fifteen: I’m Kris Kringle From the 1970 TV Movie Santa Claus is Comin’ to Town and it Is Time to Let Me Die by Caroline Cook
Book Sixteen: The Pocket-Sized Book of Believer Lists (excerpted from Believer’s issues 140-145 by Ginger Greene)
Book Seventeen: Surely People Will Remember Me, Ebenezer Scrooge, as the Christmas-Loving Man I Became by Jordan Call
Book Eighteen: Translation of a Seemingly Pleasant Conversation Between My Two Aunts at Christmas by Rose O’Shea
Book Nineteen: Twenty-One Very Short Stories by Sparrow (excerpted from Thirty Six Very Short Stories originally published in McSweeney’s Issue 70)
Book Twenty: The Re-Gifts of the Wise Men by Riane Konc
Book Twenty-One: I Regret to Inform You That My Wedding to Captain Von Trapp Has Been Cancelled by Melinda Taub
Book Twenty-Two: This Woman in Labor is Going to Love My Drumming by Tom Smyth
Book Twenty-Three: Flowers for the Day After Tomorrow by Tucker Nichols (paintings excerpted from the upcoming book Mostly Everything: The Art of Tucker Nichols, coming 2025 from McSweeny’s)
Book Twenty-Four: The Twelve Days of Christmas by Colin Nissan