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All posts tagged
cars
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January 12, 2023I’m Here to Buy a Car that Will Compensate for My Enormous Vagina
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November 18, 2022I’m the Owner of the Car Aboard the Titanic, and I Demand to Know Who Had Sex in It
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November 2, 2022I’m a Driver in a Subaru Commercial. Please Send Help
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October 6, 2022Modes of Transportation I Trust More Than Tesla’s Self-Driving Cars
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August 4, 2022For My Next Death-Defying Stunt, I Will Ride My Bike in This Bike Lane
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July 28, 2022I’m the Average Driver on the Road Right Now, and I’m Out of My Fucking Mind
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June 17, 2022This Father’s Day, Give Your Dad the Only Gift He Really Wants: A Story about How You Found a Great Parking Spot
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June 13, 2022Everyone Should Have to Use My Horrible Parking App
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April 7, 2022Open Letter to the Drivers of Uptown Manhattan Who Honk as My Son Gets on His School Bus
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April 6, 2022From Now On, the Fast & Furious’s Dominic Toretto Will Only Drive a Honda Odyssey
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January 24, 2023Macroeconomic Changes Have Made It Impossible for Me to Want to Pay You
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May 13, 2022Ten Possibilities the Applebee’s Waitress Considers Before It Occurs to Her the Women in Booth Fourteen Might Be a Couple with Two Children
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January 10, 2023Fifteen Long-Overdue Slang Terms for Female Masturbation
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October 30, 2009Letters From the Hellbox: Caslon, Baskerville, and Franklin: Revolutionary Types
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February 3, 2023Our New AP African-American Studies Course Will Cover Black History from January 1996 to December 1996
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February 3, 2023FAQ: Is My Child Eating Enough Pirate’s Booty?
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February 2, 2023Two People Who Don’t Have Cable TV Talk About How They Don’t Have Cable TV, and How Great That Makes Them
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February 2, 2023Elden Ring or Tenure-Track Professor?