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All posts tagged
founding-fathers
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July 3, 2024How I Imagine the Drafting of the Declaration of Independence Would Have Gone If the Founders Had Been Eating Buffalo Chicken Pizza
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July 3, 2023John Hancock Explains His Big Signature
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July 3, 2023Definitions of Popular Gen Z Terms from the Founding Fathers’ Dictionary of Patriotic American English
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July 1, 2022Laws Should Be Based Solely on the Words of Constitutional Authors Like Me, the Guy Who Died After Shoving a Piece of Whalebone in His Dick
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September 16, 2021The Founders Would Like to Remind You They’ve Been Dead for Nearly Two Hundred Years
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July 3, 2020It’s Time to Sign the Declaration of Independence, and I, Elbridge Gerry, Will Have the Biggest Signature of All
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July 2, 2020Kink-Shaming and a Cover-Up: Benjamin Franklin and the Story of the US Standard Measurement System
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December 2, 2016If I Had to Make Out With the Founding Fathers Because Gary Sinise Was Threatening Me With a Gun, This is the Order I’d Go In
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January 6, 2010Chris White Answers Profound Questions About the Presidents: What Did the Founding Fathers Smell Like?
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July 15, 2024I Can’t Believe Such a Hateful, Violent Act Could Happen in the Hateful, Violent Era I’ve Created
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July 12, 2024Schedule of Speakers for the 2024 Republican National Convention
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July 16, 2024Hillbilly Elegy Edited for J. D. Vance’s Vice Presidential Campaign
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May 10, 2024What Your Favorite ’90s Band Says About the Kind of Bored Suburban Mom You Are Today
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July 26, 2024I’m a Childless Cat Lady, and If Trump and Vance Win I’m Going to Start a Sexual Relationship with My Couch
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July 26, 2024Skills You Need as President of the United States or Skills You Need as a Stepmom?
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July 26, 2024If They’d Told Me We Were Poor, I Wouldn’t Have Tolerated the Cynics
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July 26, 2024We Went Ahead and Made an AI Olympian