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All posts tagged
jerks
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December 27, 2021Hello, We Used to Know Each Other and Now I’m a Toxic Presence on Your Social Media Feeds
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May 11, 2021Bow Down to Me, Pathetic Mortals, For I Have a Loud Engine
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March 30, 2021It’s Me, the Diner Who Never Tips, and I’m Absolutely Thrilled Your Restaurant Is Reopening
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December 17, 2020An Open Letter to the Paperboys in Newsies Who Nicknamed Their Friend “Crutchie”
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December 14, 2020You Can’t Call Yourself a Woman Until a Man Has Written a Wall Street Journal Op-Ed on Why You Don’t Deserve the Title You’ve Earned
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June 22, 2020I’m the Guy Setting Off Fireworks Every Night In Your Neighborhood and I Have You Right Where I Want You
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June 22, 2018A Person With Down Syndrome or Corey Lewandowski?
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March 1, 2018My Entire Personality is Based On a Bunch of Stock Images for “Travel Writer,” and I Will Have a Mental Breakdown If You Don’t Tell Me I’m Special
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January 25, 2018Quiz: Janet’s Father Has Died. Can You Make This About You?
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November 14, 2017An Open Letter to the Person on the Internet Who Likes Fighting With Me
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November 13, 2018If People Talked to Other Professionals the Way They Talk to Teachers
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May 13, 2022Ten Possibilities the Applebee’s Waitress Considers Before It Occurs to Her the Women in Booth Fourteen Might Be a Couple with Two Children
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May 2, 2022Welcome to the Middle-Aged Restaurant. Please Stop Complaining
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May 2, 2016I Would Rather Do Anything Else Than Grade Your Final Papers
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May 19, 2022Dorm Room Checklist for New Woodmont Students
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May 19, 2022I Know What’s Best For You All Over the World: Guilt Lessons and Other Poems
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May 19, 2022I Regret to Inform You That I Can Get Pregnant with My Legs Closed
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May 18, 2022A Passenger’s One-Star Review of the Trolley Ride from the Trolley Problem