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June 10, 2022We, the Herbivores of Jurassic Park, Have Unionized. Here Are Our Demands
May 4, 2021Sure, Velociraptor Repellent Is 95% Effective Against Velociraptor Attacks, But Do We Really Need to Wear It to Visit Jurassic Park?
December 30, 2020Sure, the Velociraptors Are Still On the Loose, But That’s No Reason Not to Reopen Jurassic Park
October 5, 2020Just Because I Was Mauled by Velociraptors Doesn’t Mean I Haven’t Done an Excellent Job Handling the Velociraptor Attacks
November 12, 2014The Boy from Jurassic Park’s College Application Essay