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All posts tagged
paris-hilton
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August 15, 2011Non-Essential Mnemonics: Most Tourists Can’t Distinguish Between the Famous Hilton Sisters and Random Other Slutty Celebrity Starlets. Paris, Nicky, Lindsay Lohan, Heidi Pratt, Whoever Else—All are Identically Classless to the Typical Foreigner
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March 3, 2011“Song of Myself 2011: Celebrity Heiress Edition.”
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January 20, 2008The Convergences Contest: Carnival of Convergences No. 5
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November 28, 2006Mike Richardson-Bryan’s Five Stages of Grief: Paris Hilton
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October 4, 2005Sestina: We’ll Always Have Paris Hilton
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April 21, 2004Sestina: Cowboys
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May 13, 2022Ten Possibilities the Applebee’s Waitress Considers Before It Occurs to Her the Women in Booth Fourteen Might Be a Couple with Two Children
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November 13, 2018If People Talked to Other Professionals the Way They Talk to Teachers
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May 18, 2022A Passenger’s One-Star Review of the Trolley Ride from the Trolley Problem
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May 2, 2022Welcome to the Middle-Aged Restaurant. Please Stop Complaining
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May 20, 2022How Oizys, Greek Goddess of Misery, Spends Her Sundays
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May 20, 2022My Prediction That Political Attacks Against Me Will Escalate Has Nothing to Do With Me Exposing Myself to a Flight Attendant
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May 20, 2022Diseases All Woodmont Alumni from 1971 to 2021 Should Immediately Be Screened For
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May 20, 2022Babies Need to Pull Themselves Up by Their Tiny Bootstraps