TODAY’S
FEATURE
Literary Couchsurfing References
by Jason Edward Harrington
RECENTLY
I Don’t See Raceby Christopher Mah
The President’s Challenge Adult Fitness Test Reconsiders Its Audience
by Pete Reynolds
Rosencrantz and Guildenstern and Hall and Oates
by John Peck
I’d Like To Take a Moment to Talk About the Plight of Drone Veterans
by Luke Burns
The Johnsons Go Gatsby
by Amy Vansant
How to Host a Genre-Reveal Party
by Jessica Francis Kane
A Message to Shareholders About Our New $70 Million Purchase of “Elevator Pass.”
by John Flowers
ALSO NEW
Position Papers from the Apple Pie and Machine Guns Institute: Position Paper #13: Fuck Scienceby Stuart Winchester
POPULAR
I Would Like to Be Popeby John Ortved
Monologue: I’m Comic Sans, Asshole.
by Mike Lacher
Nate Silver Offers Up a Statistical Analysis of Your Failing Relationship
by Jory John
The Only Thing That Can Stop This Asteroid is Your Liberal Arts Degree
by Mike Lacher
It’s Not You, It’s Quantitative Cost-Benefit Analysis
by Josh Freedman
The Ultimate Guide to Writing Better Than You Normally Do
by Colin Nissan
COLUMNS
Position Papers from the Apple Pie and Machine Guns Institute
Lists
Are You Telling Me That This Sucker’s Nuclear? Adventures in Atomic Tourism
Getting a Head: Touring the World as a Giant Dancing Bear
Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs
Family Practice: An Occasional Column by “Dr.” Amy Fusselman
God’s Little Acre of Diamonds: Observations On Travel Ball in Cobb County, Georgia
Non-Essential Mnemonics
Abandoned Joke Lists from the Bob’s Burgers Writer’s Room
Reviews of New Food
Interviews With People Who Have Interesting or Unusual Jobs
Short Imagined Monologues
The 49ers: Oral Histories of Americans Facing 50
Letters to McSweeney’s
ALL COLUMNS
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