Archive

It’s Extremely Divisive of You to Tell the Truth

7 Ways to Hide the Release of Frozen 2 From Your Kid

Animals Got Problems: All By Myself

A Eulogy for Comedy

Professor Minerva McGonagall’s Letter to the Tenure Committee

Four Times I Came Back From the Bathroom With a Wet Spot On My Pants, But It Was Not From Pee, It Was Just Water, and the Songs I Chose to Try and Air Guitar My Way Through Each Situation

Guns Don’t Kill People. People Kill People. It’s Time We Get Rid of People

Famous Philosophers’ Pick-Up Lines

Real Guillotine Operators Sever Heads Every Day

Congress Needs to Stop This Impeachment Nonsense and Instead Focus on What It Can Actually Accomplish, Like Undermining Every International Commitment It’s Ever Made

Sexistential Quandaries

It’s Not Just an Artisanal Urinal Cake — It’s Also Your New Phone Charger!