How Other School Subjects Would Be Spelled by People Who Refer to the Three R’s As “Reading, ’Riting, and ’Rithmetic.” - McSweeney’s Internet Tendency

Internet Tendency

Daily humor almost every day since 1998.

Daily humor almost every day since 1998.

MCSWEENEY'S QUARTERLY SUBSCRIPTIONS

“An enduring literary presence.”—Chicago Tribune

“Brilliant and always surprising.”—Detroit Free Press

Subscribe to McSweeney’s Quarterly today.

Use the code TENDENCY at checkout for $5 off.

Fizzix
G-Ografee
Sike-Ology
Kemistree
L-G-Bra
Jim
French

Please help support our writers and keep our site ad-free by becoming a patron today!

Become a patron

Suggested Reads

January 27, 2006

A Mother’s Plea

by Jim Stallard
May 25, 2004

An Open Letter to My Eighth-Grade Long-Term Substitute Science Teacher

by Karen Schmidt
July 18, 2000

Periodic Table of the Elementary School

by Alysia Gray Painter
December 14, 2023

An Open Letter to the Eleven Adults Responsible for the Majority of Book Bans in Schools

by Melanie Winklosky

Trending 🔥

April 5, 2024

I’m the Draft List at This Brewery and No, You Can’t Have a Light Beer

by Emily Delaney
March 27, 2024

Class Is Canceled Until Further Notice While I Do My Job

by Laura McCullough
April 3, 2024

Emails from My Dentist That Would Actually Make Me Schedule an Appointment

by Tom Smyth
February 6, 2024

My Comments Are in the Google Doc Linked in the Dropbox I Sent in the Slack

by Gwynna Forgham-Thrift

Recently

April 19, 2024

Is It a Red Flag? (Jane Eyre Edition)

by Amy Greenlee
April 19, 2024

Letters to Moms: A Letter to Alison in Knocked Up

by Kristen Mulrooney
April 19, 2024

Other Things That Could Be Called The Tortured Poets Department

by Rebecca Turkewitz
April 18, 2024

Good News, Husband: I’ve Become a Tradwife

by Wendi Aarons and Johanna Gohmann

McSweeney’s manifesto issue is here!

Featuring life- and history-changing works from André Breton, Bertrand Russell, Valerie Solanas, Huey Newton, John Lee Clark, Dadaists, Futurists, Communists, Personists, and many more past and future -ists, plus brand-new work from brilliant radical thinkers Eileen Myles and James Hannaham. Subscribe now to let this incendiary collection light your whole world on fire.