In the 30s, A-cup breasts were called nubbins,
B-cups snubbins,
C-cups droopers, and D-cups super droopers.
In the 50s, a bullet bra could make a bombshell
of most women. Pointy torpedo cups
had every Hollywood starlet hooked.
But Tinkerbell was only a 32-A, flitting past Captain Hook,
Peter Pan admiring her nubbins
as he cupped
her in his hands and snubbed
adulthood. When he dropped a bombshell—
that he wanted to be a boy forever—she drooped
in his palm, wishing for a padded bra, her eyes drooping
too.
Snow White was a respectable 36-B, just enough to hook
the prince without being tawdry. Snow was a bombshell,
though, to the dwarves, little nubbins
of men she snubbed
without meaning to, filling their tiny cups
with grape juice instead of wine. A couple
of times she even mixed up their names.
Cinderella drooped
until her fairy godmother found her the right bra. Snubbing
her flat-chested stepsisters, Cinderella hooked
herself into one sturdy 38-C underwire and two luscious nubs
emerged through her ragged blouse. The bombshell
of the ball, she was afraid to drop a bombshell
on Prince Charming, that she’d be cupping
well water and cleaning cinders by morning, nubbins
of pollen and feathers stuck in the straw of her droopy
broom.
Sleeping Beauty almost looked like a hooker
with those 40-D knockers which seemed to snub
the Evil Queen’s saggy cleavage. When the Queen’s mirror snubbed
her in favor of the younger “fairest of them all” bombshell,
Evil cast her spell and Sleeping Beauty was off the hook
(at least when it came to housework). She lazed around, her cupped
hands solemn across her waist. All the tulips drooped
towards her to whisper into the pink nubbins
of her ears: Never snub your dreams, drink from the cup
of your bombshelled unconscious, where para-droopers
unhook nubbins of meaning as you snooze in your Maidenform Bra.