Last Names That Are More Common Than My Own, According to the Census Bureau

by Seth Kolloen

Crisafulli
Zwickl
Penix
Luttenegger
Froschheiser
Dabdoub
Gothro
Mutschelknaus
Schrumph
Schroot
Schremp
Kraskouskas
Bitler

As little as $1 a month ($12 a year!) goes a long way towards supporting our editorial staff and contributors while keeping us ad-free. Become a McSweeney’s Internet Tendency patron today.

Become a patron

Trending 🔥

August 24, 2020

Frog and Toad Tentatively Go Outside After Months In Self-Quarantine

by Jennie Egerdie
November 18, 2020

Lest We Forget the Horrors: A Catalog of Trump’s Worst Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes: The Complete Listing (So Far): Atrocities 1- 995

by Ben Parker, Stephanie Steinbrecher, Kelsey Ronan, John McMurtrie, Sophia DuRose, Rachel Villa, and Amy Sumerton
November 11, 2020

Say “Megan Follows Is the Best Anne of Green Gables” or I’ll Beat the Living Shit Out of You

by Robert Rooney
November 12, 2020

Meet Olivia! The COVID-19-Era American Girl Doll

by Molly Cahen

Recently

November 24, 2020

How to Make a Cornucopia, Because It’s Come to This

by Meg Goetz
November 23, 2020

Congratulations to Ourselves on Defeating the Pandemic from the College’s Associate Vice President of Self-Congratulation

by Matthew Thiele
November 23, 2020

33 Everyday Tasks That Are Easier with a Penis

by Bobbie Armstrong and Laura Leelun
November 23, 2020

Dan Kennedy Solves Your Storytelling Problems: Episode 2

by Dan Kennedy

McSWEENEY'S INTERNET TENDENCY'S PATREON

Last Names That Are More Common Than My Own, According to the Census Bureau

by Seth Kolloen

Actual Titles of Résumés Posted by Job Seekers on a San Francisco-Area Website

Proposed Hobbies for My Friend Stan’s Mom and the Reasons They Were Scrapped

Suggested Reads

Trending 🔥

Recently