Ten Days. Dozens of countries. One cause to unite a fractured world. It’s The Challenge.

Do it for your friends and co-workers, your parents and their parents, your siblings and their siblings. Do it for the tote bag. Take The Challenge.

The Challenge is civic impact on a global scale. It’s worldwide influence with local flair. You’ll be proud to know you made a difference by participating. A difference only you can make. Seven billion different differences across the world.

You can take The Challenge at home, at work, or at school. Participants are helping to make the world a better place for themselves and their children, and their children’s children, and those future generations when we’ll all pretty much just be brains. Sign up, sign in, sign on to The Challenge.

The Challenge will change the way you think. It will shift your paradigm. The Challenge is an old lady and a young woman at the same time. It’s a vase and a couple kissing. It’s 17 Photos You Need To Really Look At Closely To Understand. Find out more at www.the-challenge.com.

The Challenge knows you better than you know yourself. It knows that terrible thing you did once, and it forgives you. The Challenge agrees that your mom is projecting. Clearly the Thanksgiving incident was more about her than you. The Challenge thinks your screenplay has some great bones. It has a few suggestions, if you ever want to hear them. No pressure.

The Challenge is proud of you. It wants you to succeed. You’ve prepared your whole life for The Challenge. Remember: The hot coals stand for bravery. The platform stands for your journey. The blindfold stands for faith and the spikes for what you’ve overcome. The lion is a lion.

Soon you’ll step onto the platform and into your place in the sun. You’re ready. Look to your left. Look to your right. Look at the old lady at the head of the line. Or is she a young woman? Hundreds of people are here to take The Challenge with you. Today is the first day of the rest of your lives. The Challenge begins in 5, 4, 3, 2…

Oh, shit…

Quick. Get involved. We have to trap this lion — together.

It can’t be done without your help. Especially if you own a tranquilizer gun.

Can lions smell fear? Or is that metaphorical? What’s the definition of a felony? Find out more at www.google.com.

Please don’t hate The Challenge. It meant well. It’s for an important cause that we should all be aware of. Multiple sclerosis or literacy or something. Or securing the northernmost door to the African Plains Exhibit at the Cleveland Zoo in light of the recent mysterious break-in. Pretty sure it’s that last one.

Start a conversation. With the police. Explain this was never supposed to happen. Tell them The Challenge really brought the town together, in spite of its shortcomings. Tell them it had a heart of gold. No, not your Official The Challenge Participant Heart of GoldTM. You can expect those in 8-12 weeks.