1. Yes, the clerk can look up every title you have ever rented.

2. Gold tags are for classic or foreign films.

3. All the Sartre and Camus in the world will not make you question the universe so much as one look at the box for the video “Fuck Pigs 5”.

4. Mason likes death metal.

5. A maroon tag could be for a cult film or an alternative lifestyle-themed film. You either have to know the movie or just go look. It’s no big deal: the sections are right next to each other.

6. Men in the gay porn section do not mind me coming in to restock the tags.

7. Men in the straight porn section mind it a lot.

8. Except for those who are a little too interested in talking to me.

9. As an assistant manager, Megan does not think it is appropriate to play death metal in the store.

10. Blue tags are for dramas.

11. Upon reflection, what bothers me is not so much that the ladies are referred to as “fuck pigs,” but rather that this is the fifth in a series.

12. Mason thinks Megan has been trying to get death metal banned because she doesn’t like it.

13. “Latin Thugs” is a very, very popular title.

14. Action movies get red tags.

15. Megan likes death metal, really, it’s just that she’s tired of hearing Steve, the manager, bitch about it.

16. For reasons beyond my ken, Prague is a popular destination for both gay and straight pornographic filmmakers.

17. Comedies get yellow tags.

18. Mason plays a little guitar. Casey plays the drums.

19. One day, Mason and Casey will jam together.

20. The beat cop’s name is Tony.

21. Sometimes people steal the porn boxes. Not the videos, just the boxes.

22. Megan plays a little bass.

23. The bisexual porn section is inaccurately named. It is in fact transsexual porn. Bisexual porn that involves girl-on-girl action goes to the straight section. Guy-on-guy action goes to the gay section.

24. Horror movies get red or clear tags.

25. Mason doesn’t really want Megan to enjoy death metal. It would somehow be less bad-ass if she, being female, really got it. Mason does not express this thought, but it is there, trust me.

26. If the credit card printer is acting up, turn it off and turn it back on again. It will work. No one knows why.

27. One of the regular customers has a flag on his computer file because he has a habit of returning tapes covered in lube.

28. Easy access to video equipment has made the porn industry more egalitarian, but has also caused a huge drop in quality, at least as far as thinking up clever titles goes.

29. Obviously, the New Releases section is going to have tags of every color, except for the Adult stuff, which goes into Adult New Releases downstairs.

30. Mason and Casey are never, ever going to let Megan jam with them, though none of them is consciously aware of this.