McSWEENEY'S INTERNET TENDENCY'S PATREON
Help support our writers and keep our site ad-free.
Become a McSweeney’s Internet Tendency patron today.
Articles by
Curtis Edmonds
-
June 6, 2016Key Ring Chronicles: Cotter Pin
-
May 20, 2015I’m Not Going to Teleport to Stop & Shop Just Because You Are Out of Contact Lens Solution
-
October 16, 2013Position Announcement, Staff Auditor (Internal), Open To All Applicants, But Especially Sheila in Risk Management
-
February 27, 2013Banned Performance Enhancing Substances in Literary Competitions
-
June 8, 2012Frequently Asked Questions About Filing for Temporal Bankruptcy
-
December 5, 2011I’m Sorry That My Robot Car Ran Over Your Robot Cat
-
March 31, 2011Llanwyn the Unforgiving Seeks Vengeance at a Strip Mall Starbucks
-
November 15, 2010You Built This City On What?
-
June 8, 2010I Don’t Know, Honey, Where Do You Want To Eat?
-
July 29, 200936 Hours on Tralfamadore
-
March 25, 2009Cover Stories From the Most-Requested Back Issues of The American Prognosticator (1853—1987)
-
November 19, 2008The Cervine Patient Begins His Analysis
Trending 🔥
-
September 2, 2021Oh My Fucking God, Get the Fucking Vaccine Already, You Fucking Fucks
-
September 7, 2021A Short Quiz for My Students in Lieu of Asking About Their Vaccine Status or Requesting That They Wear Masks
-
October 9, 2009It’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers
-
September 8, 2021Wake Up, Sailors, Scurvy Is a Hoax
Recently
-
September 17, 2021Our Faculty Success Initiative Redefines Everything You Thought You Knew About “Faculty” and “Success”
-
September 17, 2021Adam and Eve Decide Who Should Be in Charge of Childbirth
-
September 16, 2021The Founders Would Like to Remind You They’ve Been Dead for Nearly Two Hundred Years
-
September 16, 2021Updated COVID Guidelines: A Flow Chart Wrapped in a Riddle Shrouded in a Clusterfuck