Daily humor
almost every day
since 1998.
almost every day
since 1998.
McSWEENEY'S INTERNET TENDENCY'S PATREON
Articles by
Dan Carroll
Dan Carroll is a writer living in Brooklyn, NY. The fact that he’s able to maintain a living in this discipline is a complete anomaly to him, his family, and most around him. Nothing makes sense. This simply cannot be.
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November 8, 2018Turns Out the Blue Wave Was Actually the Ocean Rising to Kill Us
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October 11, 2018List: The Coaching Candidates for Every Youth Soccer Team In America
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March 7, 2018Welcome to Newscycle: The World’s Most Exhausting Cycling Workout
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June 24, 2015The Results of Doc’s Medical Examination On the Other Six Dwarfs
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March 18, 2019A Statement from the University of Pennsylvania Regarding the College Admissions Bribery Scandal
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March 13, 2019In My Day, All It Took to Get into Yale Was Gumption, Hard Work, and Being a Direct Male-Line Descendent of William Howard Taft
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March 18, 2019March Sadness
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March 19, 2019List: Impossible reCAPTCHAs
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March 22, 2019To Make It As an Artist, I Recommend Having Unlimited Time and Money
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March 22, 2019List: What Guests Said At the Patriarchy’s Funeral
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March 22, 2019
Phoenix, a New Mini-Book by Dave Eggers About His Visit to an Arizona Trump Rally, at Which Dozens of Citizens Freely Carried AR-15s, Hundreds (Including the Author) Were Teargassed, and Miraculously No One Was Killed or Wounded -
March 22, 2019Excerpts From Gabriel García Márquez’s Love In the Time of Covfefe