ILLUSTORIA MAGAZINE
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Articles by
John Jodzio
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May 16, 2019I Hide Gold Doubloons In My Baby’s Thigh Folds
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July 22, 2015An Excerpt from My Court Ordered Gardening Blog: Pickling Tips
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October 23, 2012My Roomba Won’t Stop Boning My Geode
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October 19, 2011Crafting Really Takes My Mind Off My Troubles
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August 3, 2011My Codpiece Smells Like Soup
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March 23, 2011Recently I Passed a Kidney Stone That Looked Like a Shark’s Tooth
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April 2, 2008The Monroe Family Bed Wishes to Die
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January 9, 2007James, I Cannot Even Begin To Imagine Who Threw A Bag Full Of Feces Into Your Dishwasher
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August 12, 2005A Toast to Randy, the Oldest Son in My Secret Family
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September 20, 2024It’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers
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September 30, 2024Faculty, Rejoice: Gmail Can Now Translate “Deanspeak”
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September 25, 2024I Am a Lady, and Donald Trump Is My Protector
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August 19, 2024Lest We Forget the Horrors: A Catalog of Trump’s Worst Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes: The Complete Listing: Atrocities 1–1,056
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October 8, 2024I Am the School Custodian in Charge of Classroom Litter Boxes. Ask Me Anything
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October 8, 2024I Only Offered to Do the Dishes at This Dinner Party So I Can Keep Eating
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October 7, 2024We’re Turning Our Emergency Room into a Spirit Halloween
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October 7, 2024Nine Great Thinkers Offer Manifestos for Getting Your Kid Out the Door on Time