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Articles by
Jonathan Baude
Jonathan Baude is a writer who lives in Chicago with his girlfriend, his dog, and a startlingly large houseplant.
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August 17, 2017We’re Standing Up to President Trump with Half-Priced Flatbreads Until 5 PM
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June 16, 2010See, the Giant Robosquid is a Metaphor for Your Fear of Commitment
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May 13, 2010The 7 Habits of Effectively High People
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October 30, 2009The Newsletter Of The Cryptodrome
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June 18, 2009Books On Tape
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September 14, 2007Troubleshooting Guide for Timecorp’s Vh3928 Model Time Machine
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July 12, 2007Titles From Dr. Seuss’s Brief Foray Into Realism
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April 30, 2020The Girl From Avril Lavigne’s “Sk8er Boi” Responds 18 Years Later
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June 26, 2020A Message from Your University’s Vice President for Magical Thinking
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June 24, 2020Lest We Forget the Horrors: A Catalog of Trump’s Worst Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes: The Complete Listing (So Far): Atrocities 1-759
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June 22, 2020I’m the Guy Setting Off Fireworks Every Night In Your Neighborhood and I Have You Right Where I Want You
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July 7, 2020An Open Letter to Straight Couples Who Have Been Quarantining Together After Only Dating For a Few Weeks From a Lesbian Who’s Been There Before
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July 7, 2020
This Has Been Happening Forever, But Never So Close to Me -
July 7, 2020I Do Not Choose to Write My 902-Page Fantasy Ninja Thriller — I Am Compelled To
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July 7, 2020Knotted Ribbon