McSWEENEY'S INTERNET TENDENCY'S PATREON
Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month and get access to author interviews, content calls, discounts at our store, and more. Help support our writers and keep our site ad-free.
Articles by
Michael Ward
-
March 19, 2013A Memo to Investors in 11D Technologies, Inc
-
February 3, 2011Words That Could Conceivably Be Used to Describe Both the Super Bowl and a Superb Owl
-
May 9, 2007Your Proposed Design For The New Roosevelt Elementary School
-
November 6, 2006The Race For Junior Class Vice President Goes Negative
-
January 13, 2006Words and Phrases I Hope Never Appear in Front of My Name in Print
-
August 18, 2005The Weekly Column of a Local-Newspaper Ombudsman Attempting to Communicate His Marital Frustrations Through His Work
-
May 12, 2005Fun Facts About Chinese President Hu Jintao, as Conveyed by American Culture
-
January 28, 2005New State Names Resulting From the Coming Wave of Mergers and Acquisitions
-
August 27, 2004E-mail Addresses It Would Be Really Annoying to Give Out Over the Phone
-
August 23, 2004Words That Could Conceivably Be Used to Describe Both Sherpas and Sherbet
-
April 28, 2004Create Your Own Thomas Friedman Op-Ed Column
-
March 19, 2004Suggested Masters Thesis Titles Making Use of Puns On a 1983 Marvin Gaye Classic
Trending 🔥
-
March 10, 2025As an American Jew, I Feel Completely Reassured for My Safety Now That Trump Has Targeted the Epicenter of American Antisemitism, Columbia University
-
March 6, 2025Killing Baby Boomers Will Save the United States Government Trillions
-
March 5, 2025Short Conversations with Poets: Dong Li
-
March 7, 2025Happy National Women’s Day from the White House
Recently
-
March 14, 2025A Memorandum from the Newly Established Department of Grammar Efficiency
-
March 14, 2025Excerpts from The Believer: An Interview with Michael Smith
-
March 14, 2025Nothing Stands Between Us Teachers and the Brainwashing of America’s Children, Except This Beef Jerky in the Pencil Sharpener
-
March 13, 2025It’s a Shame We Have to Betray Our Allies, Starve the Poor, Halt Scientific Progress, Destroy the Environment, and Eliminate the Freedoms Enshrined in the Bill of Rights, but at Least My Investment Portfolio Is Also Tanking